Moment of Clarity

A friend of mine posted a FB status that got me to think. He was asking, "why do women complain about there being no such thing as a good man..." He continued, "where are the good women?" I felt compled to respond, to sum it up, I explained to him that each person was created for one specific person. Just b/c a good man and a good woman meet, doesn't equate to a Happily Ever After story. We have to be conscience of the roles people play in our lives. They could very well be our soul mate, not recognizing them would leave you with a life without love.

This triggerred a conversation that I would like to have with a particular person in my life. I respect the choice that was made on his behalf, but it's not one with which I can be comfortable with for myself. I am confident that my random moment of clarity is in fact the truth. For years, I have tried to live by this very statement with all the wrong ppl. I have no regrets for standing strong next to a man that wasn't my own. I have proven to myself as well as to them that I am one to be prized and to be appreciated with loyalty and respect. I cannot speak with certainty, but I do feel as though this could be it for me. There are numerous obstacles, life changing judgment calls and sacrifies that are required to be made in order for the relationship to meet it's full potential. As usual, I am more then willing to move forward with this opportunity that could blossom into a dream come true for the both of us. When he broke the news to me, it felt like a blow to the chest knocking the breath out of my lungs. It has been a few days now and I'm at war with myself because I know exactly what needs to happen, but for some reason I am unable to proceed with my ultimate decision. If I continued with this nonsense, I would continue with a lie, something we agreed against. Do I fight showing that I am awake, I do recognize my soul mate and that I have met my match? Or do I fall back and let the one person who will ever truely fullfilled me, make a decision on his own? What if he has not begun his journey towards my place of awarness, do I just wait until he to has his moment of clarity?

I am not that type of woman who will allow her man to have his cake and eat it too. I am a one man woman; Either you're with me or you're not. I am in love with you, but I must protect my heart and my sanity. I will not further this false hood with you any longer and because I have retained the same respect for you as my man. Your every wish is my command, I will give you the life that you desire. I love you!